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Sigh

it's been over a month.. and i guess.. everything seemed to turn out very well between us.. in a month.. we've been through a lot already.. that may not count too much but it did took part in making our bond tighter..

now.. i dunno.. "behind those tears....di mo alam ang iba pang rason kung bakit.." i know what's he's been up to on tellin me that.. and i don't know what to be done about that.. i know.. i'm not as expressive as he can see.. and that's what he's been using towards me.. against me.. he keeps on making several ways for me to believe that what he's showing me is true to the point that its being difficult for him.. BUT.. in the first place.. he don't have to prove to me anything anymore coz i do believe in him.. what i'm worried about is what he sees in me.. making him think that i am not satisfied of what he's been showing me....

how this all started..?

again.. because of me.. he may always tell me that its not my fault.. but i don't think it that way.. it is my fault.. or we do both have are own faults.. just that.. i always have this unintentional hyper sensitive way on reacting to such things.. which makes everything fall down to misconceptions.. misunderstandings.. quarrels.. i dunno.. whenever i have mood swings.. expect me to give you some indifferent answers..

if not settled in time.. that really is making me look for some resort.. and it do leads me to smoke.. i do take stresstabs but.. for a better relief.. expect me to have a stick or two..

its just lately that i've been doin this again.. (i do smoke before but the reason for smoking is to let me have a good night sleep.. really..) but i think.. its better off.. he don't want me to see me smoking.. that's fine with me.. i know i can do that.. for him.. well then.. settled.. besides.. i've given away a word of not making stupid acts again that will cause something not good between us..

just got the time to spent posting.. got no task for the moment..

btw.. i'm fuckin bored wit my layout...... just got no time for changin..

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